The Church of Alvis

Oh yeah baby. Though I'll probably be turned away because of education, education areas of study, wife's occupation and wife's employer.

Oh well.

Quickest way to get out of jury duty, is respond to every question they ask you with, Is the defendant black? Because I hate black people.

Furiel wrote:Quickest way to get out of jury duty, is respond to every question they ask you with, Is the defendant black? Because I hate black people.

Woah, you misunderstand. I want to do jury duty. It will be a change of pace for how I spend my workday. However I strongly doubt I would be selected. If they start asking too many questions about my thoughts on criminal justice it will no doubt get weird. For example whenever I take one of those political compass tests I end up near the edges in socialist territory.

Blackferne wrote:For example whenever I take one of those political compass tests I end up near the edges in socialist territory.

And what is the lesson we learn from this class? Taking political compass tests turn you into a socialist.

I had jury duty earlier this year and more than likely, you won't get chosen. I got into the initial selection of one trial, but then they only needed 6 and I didn't get chosen for that final six. Other than that, it's a lot of waiting. Heh.

Is "jury duty" in Texas the same as "firing line" elsewhere?

Cuspar wrote:Is "jury duty" in Texas the same as "firing line" elsewhere?

Well in that case I'll likely fail the test to be a juror. I haven't shot a gun since I was like 12.

Blackferne wrote:I haven't shot a gun since I was like 12.

And you're an Alvian in Texas? WTF? How does the impeachment procedure work here?

Sir Psyko wrote:

Blackferne wrote:I haven't shot a gun since I was like 12.

And you're an Alvian in Texas? WTF? How does the impeachment procedure work here?

We hang him from a tree and say he slipped.

Gandolfini wrote:

Sir Psyko wrote:

Blackferne wrote:I haven't shot a gun since I was like 12.

And you're an Alvian in Texas? WTF? How does the impeachment procedure work here?

We hang him from a tree and say he slipped.

you know of any trees that can hold him long enough to asphyxiate him or has the capability to snap his neck and not it's branch??

vespasian wrote:

Gandolfini wrote:

Sir Psyko wrote:

Blackferne wrote:I haven't shot a gun since I was like 12.

And you're an Alvian in Texas? WTF? How does the impeachment procedure work here?

We hang him from a tree and say he slipped.

you know of any trees that can hold him long enough to asphyxiate him or has the capability to snap his neck and not it's branch??

There's the hangin tree over by deadmans curve...

vespasian wrote:

Gandolfini wrote:

Sir Psyko wrote:

Blackferne wrote:I haven't shot a gun since I was like 12.

And you're an Alvian in Texas? WTF? How does the impeachment procedure work here?

We hang him from a tree and say he slipped.

you know of any trees that can hold him long enough to asphyxiate him or has the capability to snap his neck and not it's branch??

I've got a metal Christmas tree. If we reinforce it some it should hold.

vespasian wrote:

Gandolfini wrote:

Sir Psyko wrote:

Blackferne wrote:I haven't shot a gun since I was like 12.

And you're an Alvian in Texas? WTF? How does the impeachment procedure work here?

We hang him from a tree and say he slipped.

you know of any trees that can hold him long enough to asphyxiate him or has the capability to snap his neck and not it's branch??

Good point. A crane with a steel cable?

So I haven't shot a gun since I was 12 big freaking deal. While you plebes enjoy your boom boom sticks, I've preferred to study and embrace explosives. What's better than a bullet? A grenade.

Also flame throwers are freaking cool.

Blackferne wrote:So I haven't shot a gun since I was 12 big freaking deal. While you plebes enjoy your boom boom sticks, I've preferred to study and embrace explosives. What's better than a bullet? A grenade.

Also flame throwers are freaking cool.

When was the last time you threw a grenade? ::begins to google crane rental::

Gandolfini wrote:

Blackferne wrote:So I haven't shot a gun since I was 12 big freaking deal. While you plebes enjoy your boom boom sticks, I've preferred to study and embrace explosives. What's better than a bullet? A grenade.

Also flame throwers are freaking cool.

When was the last time you threw a grenade? ::begins to google crane rental::

I prefer dry ice bombs. 1 bottle evian. 1 chunk of dry ice. combine, seal, throw in pond.

Blackferne wrote:

Gandolfini wrote:

Blackferne wrote:So I haven't shot a gun since I was 12 big freaking deal. While you plebes enjoy your boom boom sticks, I've preferred to study and embrace explosives. What's better than a bullet? A grenade.

Also flame throwers are freaking cool.

When was the last time you threw a grenade? ::begins to google crane rental::

I prefer dry ice bombs. 1 bottle evian. 1 chunk of dry ice. combine, seal, throw in pond.

And the last time you did this was....

Furiel wrote:

Blackferne wrote:

Gandolfini wrote:

Blackferne wrote:So I haven't shot a gun since I was 12 big freaking deal. While you plebes enjoy your boom boom sticks, I've preferred to study and embrace explosives. What's better than a bullet? A grenade.

Also flame throwers are freaking cool.

When was the last time you threw a grenade? ::begins to google crane rental::

I prefer dry ice bombs. 1 bottle evian. 1 chunk of dry ice. combine, seal, throw in pond.

And the last time you did this was....

Too long.

http://www.austincrane.com/rates.php

If I don't survive tell Cuspar I love him.

Blackferne wrote: If I don't survive tell Cuspar I love him.

Cuspar wrote:

Blackferne wrote: If I don't survive tell Cuspar I love him.

You sure??

Blackferne wrote:I've said it before, and I'm saying it now, and I'm more than certain I will say it again....I hate this guild and everyone in it.

Just sayin...

Wait, there are Black people in Texas? And bobcat rentals are only $90 per hour including the Operator?

Well, I know what I am doing next time in in Austin.

Yep, eating more brisket, you racists. No one would really rent a Bobcat to bury Black people up to their necks.

Reese wrote:Wait, there are Black people in Texas? And bobcat rentals are only $90 per hour including the Operator?

Well, I know what I am doing next time in in Austin.

Yep, eating more brisket, you racists. No one would really rent a Bobcat to bury Black people up to their necks.

You should try the wet brisket next time. Mmmmmm.

Furiel wrote:

Cuspar wrote:

Blackferne wrote: If I don't survive tell Cuspar I love him.

You sure??

Blackferne wrote:I've said it before, and I'm saying it now, and I'm more than certain I will say it again....I hate this guild and everyone in it.

Just sayin...

What a failure in nominating leadership.

Hasn't fired a gun in approximately 20 years...

Thinks a grenade is an Evian bottle with dry ice tossed in a pond...

Gives crane rental rates that require you to call to get a quote...

Even the love of flamethrowers isn't redeeming since lighting your own farts doesn't really count as using a flamethrower.

I say we just shoot him in the freaking face as a TRUE Alvian would. And not with a .22 either.

Sir Psyko wrote:What a failure in nominating leadership.

Reminder: Bulwark nominated me and Dood seconded it. Take it up with them.